February Challenges

I will weigh in on Tuesdays, and Tuesdays only :)

I am shooting for a 8 pound loss, 2 pounds a week

I will drink my water everyday this month

I will take my multivitamin

I will get up early and head out to the gym for early morning workouts

I will continue counting calories 1400-1600 per day

I will update my blog at least twice a week.

I will get enough sleep

I will add ten extra minutes to my elliptical workout

I will attempt the Couch 2 5k program

My life tomorrow will be the result of my attitudes and the choices I make today.

I want to lose weight because...

-I want to be able to shop in regular stores. Big girl clothes cost more money.

-I want to stop avoiding mirrors.

-I want to be able to ride roller coasters with my kids when they are old enough.

-I want to be more social. I tend to stay away from new people and situations because I am embarrassed of the way I look.

-I want to be healthy so that I can enjoy my family and my life as long as possible.

-I want my husband to think I am hot.

-I want to be a good example for my children.

-I want to run!

-I want to people to see past my fat. There is a great person under all this. She is here with or without the fat. Unfortunately, many people can't get past the fat.

-I am tired of always being the biggest person in the room.

-I want to be able to paint my toenails without struggling to reach them.

-I want to wear a bathing suit that doesn't include a skirt

-I want to prove to myself that I AM strong and I CAN accomplish great things with perseverance, willpower, and a love for myself.

Jan 24

Here is my intake for today.

Feeling better now.

Step class really whooped my butt tonight BUT I kept up so much better this time :)

I also did 20 minutes of weights.

I do feel like a 1000 times better!

The hater in the mirror

I am really hating on myself today.

I wish I could stop.

Maybe I will feel better after I work out tonight. That's right. You heard me. I did NOT drag my lazy ass out of bed and go work out this morning and I have felt like poo about it all day. Not to mention I have felt exhausted all damn day.

That's one of the wonderful things about depression. You can put yourself into a coma at will.

But seriously, I can't blame everything on my mental woes.

I knew better than to stay up watching movies with Matt last night.

I also new better than to gorge myself on carbs yesterday. Even though I stayed under 2000 calories yesterday, I was way above my limit and they weren't "good" calories.

However, today I have done really well with my calorie count. I guess guilt is as good of a motivational tool as anything. My only problem is that I have nearly met of my sodium and protein allowances for the day and I haven't even eaten dinner yet.

Bah!

Off to eat some dinner and then Step class.

Jan 23

I am still trying to decide on an effective, aesthetically pleasing way to post my caloric intake for the day. This is just a screenshot of my MyPlate food diary at www.livestrong.com.

Today was not a good day in terms of food and exercise as you can see. I got pretty carb crazy this afternoon and chomped down a bunch of pita chips and cheesy nibbles.

Bad girl! Bad, bad girl!

Oh well! Sucking it up and moving on. Tomorrow is another day.

To top it off, Matt and I had planned to take the boys swimming this afternoon but we got the schedule mixed up and family swim was just about to end when we got to the Y. The boys were so bummed and I have to admit I was really bummed too.

So we went on a produce run and back home. Matt and I were feeling like lazy bastards for not getting a workout in so we decided to give Jillian's 30 Day Shred a go. Jillian really kicked our butts!

Aidan joined in and he totally rocked it, making sure to rub it in our faces :)

So, that was our somewhat disappointing day. I have a new schedule in mind to start tomorrow because Mondays were made for that sort of thing.

The worst part is that it entails dragging my ass out of bed at 5 am.

I can do it!

"I want my fat to be symmetrical!"

This is what I told my trainer this morning when she asked what I wanted to work on.

I mean, let's be honest, when you weigh as much as I do, you really can't complain about "problem areas. The whole body is a problem area.

One of my most embarrassing features right now is the extra fat roll I am carrying around on my left arm. Both arms are really big, "ham-esque" if you will, but that one extra roll on my left arm is driving me nuts.

She said she understood and said it was nice to have a client with honest, achievable expectations. She frequently has clients come in expecting to lose 50 pounds in 30 days.

Whatever...

I know I am not going to be bikini ready in June.

I know I have a very long road ahead of me.

But, in the mean time, I am trying to focus on small, reasonable goals.

So, that's it for now.

My mini-goals for now are to work on balancing out my fat arms, sticking to my exercise schedule and weighing in under 250lbs by Valentine's Day.

Will update my caloric intake tonight.